Sex and the Christian

C H U R C H   R E F O R M    S E R I E S

By Biblicism Institute

Gustav Klimt - The KissFrom the very beginning God intended sex to be special.

It is connected to marriage and must only happen within its confines. See The Biblical Marriage Blueprint.

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” Ephesians 5:31

But man in his rebellious streak seems intent on using it his own way.


Sex is God’s idea. He has his reasons for it.

1. It is a spiritual act above all else.

“Now Adam knew Eve his wife.” Genesis 4:1

It is the act of knowing. The Hebrew word is Yada. It is used in a great variety of senses: observation, care, recognition, instruction, designation, punishment, acknowledgement, and myriad others. It thus encompasses the whole being.

Man gets to know his Bride by creating a bond. A bond that truly binds. A bond that is the fusion of man and woman. In other words, woman is reattached to man from whom she was taken.

“The rib which the Lord God had taken out of man, He made into a woman.” Genesis 2:22

Thus man becomes aligned with another part of himself.

“She is your companion and your wife by covenant.” Malachi 2:14

When a man knows his wife, it is a covenantal act. As with all covenants blood is involved. Blood is spilled when the woman’s hymen is pierced.

That blood-drenched punctured hymen is the true seal of the marriage covenant. God crafted the hymen for that very purpose, otherwise there would be no need for it.

If the union between man and woman is severed, one’s own Body is severed. And God is not well pleased. See Of Fornication, Divorce and Adultery

” ‘For I hate divorce,’ says the LORD.” Malachi 2:16

That very union is:

“The only institution which God loves.” Malachi 2:11

The union of man and woman is the only institution God has ever created. It is an institution that points to the Lord Jesus Himself and to the New Covenant in His blood, when His body was pierced on the cross.

The church assembly is not a man-made religious institution. It is the Body of Christ, the Bride of Christ. Jesus and His Saints form a spiritual institution which God loves. They are fused together as one through the fire of the Holy Spirit. That’s why He will never leave nor forsake His spiritual bride (Deut 31:6).

2. It is for procreation.

The reason sex is a spiritual act is because its primary purpose within the marriage covenant is to produce children.

“Now Adam knew his wife and she conceived and bore Cain.” Genesis 4:1

Man and woman become one because God is working together with them to replenish the earth with godly people.

“And why one? That He might seek a godly offspring.” Malachi 2:15

Without godliness the world would be intolerable.

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.” Matthew 5:13

Godliness is the only hope mankind has to restore balance in a topsy-turvy world. Godly people must produce godly offspring.

3. It is for man and wife to find pleasure in each other.

When a husband and his wife find pleasure in each other, opportunities for fight and quarrel become scarce, thereby creating a stable environment for child-rearing. See Of Nagging Women and Angry Men.

“You are a garden locked up, my sister, my bride; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain.” Song of Solomon 4:12

“Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice in the wife of your youth. As a loving hind and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; Be exhilarated always with her love.” Proverbs 5: 18,19

Pleasure is part of knowing one’s spouse; therefore, withholding pleasure is not an act of love.

“Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1 Cor 7:5


Sex feels good because God is quite intent on having men and their wives produce children. Therefore He made sex a pleasurable experience, His way of encouraging them to copulate.

However, mankind has perverted the entire sex paradigm.

They fornicate outside the marriage parameter only to experience the selfish pleasure of it. They further debase it by having same-sex partners gratifying  each other, thus moving even further away from producing children. And finally they bend sexuality itself by morphing men into women and women into men or transgenderism.

The whole idea of this systematic perversion is to spit on God and His plan for humanity. By bastardizing sexuality, God’s enemies hope to thwart God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 9:7). In addition, by debasing it with homosexuality and transgenderism, they mean to say, “Hey God, you don’t know what you’re doing. We can find greater pleasure outside your commands.”

“For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.” Romans 1:26-27

What they fail to realize is that man is not god, and therefore cannot make his own rules. In the end, those who break God’s commands will pay dearly for it. See The Consequences of Sin.

“Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.” Galatians 5: 19-21

Venery needs the curb and not the spur. Immoral, unnatural, and inordinate sexual desires are to be turned off and conquered. In other words, sin can be overcome.

Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry. Because of these, the wrath of God is coming.” Col 3: 5,6


Sex is one of God’s ways of blessing man and woman. In turn, man and woman become a blessing to the world through their offspring. See The Family is God’s Plan.

“Children are a blessing and a gift from the Lord.” Psalm 127:3

Everything in God’s creation has been perverted by sinful man, sex included. Therefore it is our duty as Christians to make sure that all under heaven is brought back to godly alignment, especially in our own lives as an example to all.


Preemptive Question and Answer

The following question will certainly arise: what of the covenantal blood of a non-virgin, non-divorced woman who wishes to marry?

The answer is simple.

The man she hopes to marry can either forgive her and allow Christ’s blood to cover and replace hers, or he could opt to marry a virgin. Ultimately the decision is his, not ours to make.

We are only drafting what God intended when He designed sex within the marriage covenant. In situations that deviate from established biblical norms it’s up to every Christian to listen to the voice of His Lord.

After all, each individual will give an account to God for his actions and words. That’s why the Holy Spirit has been given to us. He’s the Helper who guides each and everyone into all truths. Let him help.

“Each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.” Romans 14:12

Read also: Can a Man Have Many Wives?         

                                                                                      Read also: Jesus was not a Jew

4 thoughts on “Sex and the Christian

  1. Wonderful article. Amen!

    Hear my lamentation: I’m almost 29 years old born and raised in Canada. I personally don’t know of even ONE single woman born and raised Canadian/American women that has ever bothered to save herself for marriage. I’ve seen many Christian(?) women who go to church and be very promiscuous. The concept of a woman (and especially a man) saving herself (or himself) for marriage is so incredibly alien in this society that it shocks others to even hear of that in the day and age of sexual “liberation”. I would love to see women like that though as myself and my brother are still unmarried. And for the sake of other boys growing up here as well, I really feel sorry for them. When you talk to men you’ll find that many have no problem waiting for marriage to a compatible and good woman in ideal circumstances. But the reality is that today’s world is far less than ideal.

    I feel like the world tries to tell us more with each passing day that sexual conquests are something to be celebrated and proud of. It seems to me that girls are taught that the path to happiness is “empowerment” (i.e. being selfish and full of pride) and “patriarchal” religions are to be avoided because it will “oppress” them. They are taught that marriage and children are a hindrance to career and that women should avoid family or post-pone it in favor of their career (i.e. being a corporate slave is more important than family). It seems to me that they are taught that men are dumb and useless idiots, the cause of war and oppression, and are easily replaceable by a toy or vegetable. They are also taught that they can be free and empowered and still quench their lustful appetite by going out to get laid or using toys on themselves but they shouldn’t get too attached as they might be enslaved into a marriage.

    Until I read this article I had completely forgotten for years that women even have a hymen. I don’t know of a single woman born and raised here that cares about her hymen. You’ll find lots of “virgins” with toys in their drawers or closets that will more than likely have broken their hymen ages ago.

    Luckily my parents are immigrants and being in their home country I’ve seen the other side of the fence and have a standard to compare to.

    Please share your thoughts.


  2. I completely agree. And the prior comment is right – there are virtually no Christian virgins anymore who are not teenagers. One of the many reasons I have no intent of marrying as I always understood that according to the bible if the person has had sex with another man, to marry her would be considered adultery. It is one thing to marry someone not knowing that and ask Christ to forgive you, but I could not do so willingly because I cannot claim ignorance as an excuse. Then again, not sure that most women would even make good wives even if they were virgins because the feminists have taught them to act like men.


    • You wrote: “I always understood that according to the bible if the person has had sex with another man, to marry her would be considered adultery.”


      Fornication is distinct. Its literal meaning is playing the harlot (i.e., having sex here and there with no responsibility and no commitment). Biblical verses after biblical verses prove that.

      Marriage takes place when God-assigned authorities, the parents on both sides, agree to their siblings being joined as one. Please read The Biblical Marriage Blueprint. Otherwise, you make the marriage Covenant as ordained by God of no effect because marriage is not just the sex, it is the union of 2 people as per the agreement of 2 families with the intent to produce children.

      Now, if you don’t want to marry a non-virgin, that’s fine. There’s nothing wrong with that. But please do not spin it as if they committed adultery as per the biblical definition.

      As per YOUR definition, apparently it is adultery. BUT not according to the bible. See Of Fornication, Divorce and Adultery.


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